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Thursday, October 12, 2006

Yesterday im someones special... now im just someone

i know that everything are diffrent now and i couldnt even bare the thought of me calling you by your name.. but i'd still think of you as my baby...

I sent you all the letters and cards that i had.. cause im planning to send it to you altogether with the things you asked for.but suddenly things changed.. so however i just have to send it to you right now,cause im not sure if youre still there at your place til end of the year. or you might not be around anymore. I still want you to have it cause thats for you. I hope you'll not trash it.
Everything i said in the letter .. is true and it will stay that way, i feel stupid but thats really what i feel until now.My heart is broken but still it aches for you.In your mind & heart i may not be important anymore,i may no longer the girl you love....but for me it will remain the same. Ironic that by the time i received your letter thats also the time youve changed.My world kind'a fell apart.now all i can think about was all the things weve talked about,our plans .. its all gone.. but i still want to keep it in my heart.For me this was just a bad dream and its not true.I kept on reading your letters and i just hope it just stops there and this thing never happen.I want to go back in those times we're life is just so happy despite we both have our bad baggage and problems.

I still look at you the same way that i did before.You promised you will never leave me and that you will love me and not hurt me.you said you will never get tired of me and most of all you said and asked me to trust you.... and i did! i gave you all the trust that i can give.After all these years i never thought i could ever trust someone else anymore.. until you came along.
I thank God for making me believe again that i could still trust someone... that i could still give my heart to someone and never worry of having it break again.
I keep on repeating every single words that you said to me.I still have your image in my mind.. smiling at me ....I remember the way you smile at me its just so nice! I just really hope time stops there where all the good things are happening despite of the wrong things thats happening in our own lives. I get to hate myself for being invincible for everything that had happened...im mad at myself cause its like i made a mistake again..
I missed the way you look at me... the way you admire me... the way you make me happy because you brag about me because you said youre proud of me.Yesterday im your someone special ...but now im just someone!

Posted by HerShen :: 1:41 AM :: 2 comments